My Womb Diary - Part II

Its Dad's birthday!!! We celebrate with all my uncles, aunts and my grandparents!!! Doctor takes a look at me and tells mom that your baby needs to put on more weight. My Momma quietly tells me to stop jumping around and relax... But i am so excited!! Its only going to be a matter of few weeks before I pop.

Treats keep flowing. Love my daily dose of Vanilla Icecream. I swiftly put on weight. But the downside is that there's hardly any space to move around. Cant do my length and breaths anymore. I am floating. I guess my mom has tightened her belly. Its a conspiracy so that I dont roam around. All the food is going to my hips. :) And the weight has forced me into upside down position. Now who lives like this? With his head below and legs above??? But I am super-talented, you remember???

- August 2012

Things are moving fast. Preparations are in full swing for my arrival!! My grandparents have re-arranged Momma's room for my arrival. My dad is on stand-by. Wont be going out of town for business meets. Just when I was about to go to sleep, I over heard Mom instructing Dad what to do if she went into labour. I thought she was already into labour. Otherwise why would she take instructions from Delhi all the time and work long hours??? Maybe they are talking of some different kind of labour. I found it too boring so i dozed off. 

Then one fine evening, when Momma was driving Nani to a cultural program, I felt like peeping out. So I pushed my way out but the umbilical cord entwined around my neck rendered me breathless. I so much wanted to get out. I tell Momma that I cant do it on my own. My Momma tells me to relax... says she will handle it all!! 

I smile and relax... Afterall, thats what Mommas are for! They can handle it all!

Its Ganpati time! But Momma takes ill. She is down with flu. I behave myself. But it only gets worse. Once Momma recovers, my grandparents too take ill.They have to be administered glucose. And then... Dad fell ill.  I help in my own way. I dont trouble Momma. And every once in a while, I knock on the womb walls, so that she knows I am with her!!! Momma smiles and shares this with Dad. Dad too is smiling now. They both respond and tap on the belly to say Hi!!! And in all this, Daddy got well. I have magical powers to heal, you see!! 

Its 23rd September. I was due today. But Momma is relaxed. In no hurry for my arrival. Instead she proposes to go for Barfi!!! So I go on my last outing inside her. I must say, I loved the Choco-almond cone and Ranbir Kapoor....

On 24th September, Mom and Dad visit Dr Banker! He is not too keen to wait. Says lets get the little one out. So everyone goes into frenzy. Both grandmas' start looking for auspicious time. Mom is asked not to have any food. From that moment on, she only thinks about food. To make matters worse, Dad orders Dominoes for everyone. Chintan kaka, Vrushti Kaki, Aara, Arjun Kaka arrive at hospital. Everyone is super excited!! I hear my Devam Mama too is rushing to Ahmedabad. All this activity tires me out. I decide to take a nap as I will be finally facing the world in some time. 

And before I know it... My arrival is announced. At 4.34, I finally meet my Momma. She's beautiful. Just as i imagined. She has the broadest smile on her face. Just as i imagined. I hold her fingers. The same ones she said hi!! and caressed me with. She holds me tight in her arms as everyone arrives to take a look at me. Dad is speechless... almost with tears in his eyes!!! Afterall, I am his duplicate. The same features, same traits and in love with the same girl. We both thank Momma. :) 

And this time, as I go into Daddy's arms, Momma dozes off!!!

- September 2012

55 vs 25

"Jidhar dekho udar problems hi problems hain... "

That was the first line i heard today morning as i was woken up by a loud conversation taking place in my house. My aunt was talking to someone on the phone. I dont know what the conversation was about... but i completely agreed with the statement she made and was quick enough to gain consciousness about the world... and if i may add the 'times' we live in.

This week, infact, has been quite peculiar. Everybody and anybody has been behaving difficult. If on one hand, my travel agent who hires us the official car, is threatening to withdraw the taxi till we make the payment... on the other hand, there's my maternal grand mother who's in an extremely critical condition, which reduces my mother to tears, at every available opportunity. In both the cases, there is little i can do but sympathize...

While i can manage these problems... time and again, i have been confronted by problems (not directly affecting me) which have no solution. And they have raised many questions in my mind. In these recent days, i have realised how important task it is to bring up children. Its not just about providing them the best things in life... its also about depriving them of stuff so that they learn to value... Its not only about sharing and being part of your children's lives... but you should also realise when should you stop interfering... Its not only about providing your kids with financial support unconditionally... but its also necessary to leave them 'cashless' to realise what it takes to earn money...

Its been a heavy week to say the least...

I am not going to take names... but people might relate to these cases...

One of our family friend is a Doctor. Well educated, well settled, born with a silver spoon infact. He was born in 1950 and his parents had a car then... He could afford education in the US in his 20s. Instead chose to pursue medicine and became doctor. He married a nice homely girl and years saw them become parents to a girl and a boy. Today, the girl, who is independent in her thoughts but dependent on her parents otherwise, has chosen a partner for herself. Happens so that the guy is in his early thirties, earns just enough, has dependent parents. This uncle and aunt of mine, approached me to speak to their daughter to see if i could put "some sense" into her head.

They had made up their minds... The boy wasnt wealthy enough (what would they say in their circle perhaps was what was hounding them?). They tried every book in the trick to convince me that the boy wasnt worth spending a lifetime with and that by hook or by crook, their daughter will have to accept their decision.


What surprised me was that they hadnt even bothered to meet the guy. I was shocked to hear the parameters they considered neccessary to chose a life partner. Educated, potential to earn 'good' money and had a job, living away from parents. You see, his daughter, according to them, wasnt capable of handling a joint family. And therefore, the guy she had chosen for herself, who didnt fit their mould, wasnt good enough.

The discussion lasted four hours. I completely failed at convincing him that its a good idea to meet the guy and that children, after a certain age, are best left to decide for themselves. If nothing, they will emerge smarter and stronger from their experiences. But they would have none of it.

I guess our society just gives our elders the 'unspoken' privilege of deciding everything for their children. Some parents fail to realise that their children's happiness should weigh before their criteria. I doubt if parents actually keep their children's interest in mind while looking for life partners. More often than not, they are looking for someone, who will make them proud rather than keep their child happy. I learnt one lesson though - that people who claim to be broad minded and open about ideas and life, are not really putting their words into practise.

And if this loooooong discussion wasnt enough to roll my dad and me into after-discussions... i came across this another classic example of fights between a couple because the wife was tired of taking care of her invalid mother-in-law, coping with her kids and her full time job.


The husband and wife are not on talking terms at present. The problem is that the wife thinks her husband is taking her for granted, not paying enough attention to her, hardly helping out with the chores and plus the burden of taking care of 'his' mother. (Her cry: Why cant she stay with your younger brother?)

The husband is tired of her cribbing. He feels his wife doesnt respect his mother enough. Infact, whatever she is doing for his mother, is just a 'show'. (His cry: She hardly cares about her. Just giving medicines on time and feeding her doesnt mean you are looking after her.)


Not to forget that this couple has been having these fights over a decade now. The wife isnt comfortable with the mother-in-law around. The husband is just too much of a loving son, not to abandon his mother, only because his wife is not ready to 'accept' her.

I wasnt a part of this discussion... but i was in my room.. which was in hearing distance of this conversion. The tit and tats went on for an hour. My mom was really drowsy and she could hardly help these people out but she was a patient ear. My mom tried to pacify both of them... but they both still stood their grounds. It was time for them to leave and finally my mom could take a nap. But i was so disturbed.

Why is it so difficult for people to accept that your partners have a family? That your partner was brought up by a couple - who has loved him/her much much more than you have? Is it really difficult to make some adjustments if you have to accomodate your partner's parents? Or is it just 'inconvenience' to your lifestyle? I dont understand why couples fail to remember that our parents 'never left us alone' so that they could continue with their lifestyle? Ask any parent and they will tell you how they saved up for a home to house his family - or gave up a little bit of their sleep so that they could spend some time with their children among so many responsibilities. Any parent will vouch how they have given up on things and activities for their kids - my dad gave up smoking, my mom hardly slept with two kids, her job, her hobby, her household responsibilities. I have seen people around who have traveled for weeks and weeks together to give their children a better life. I have seen parents who have broken their fixed deposits to send their children for higher education. Infact one my relatives, broke her fixed deposit because her child wanted a CBZ for his birthday.

When our parents, without even blinking, so unconditionally, have done so much for us... cant we just give them the same place in our lives???

But i guess not many people understand. I am keeping my fingers crossed. I really really hope that God gives us (devam, amul and me) enough sense to look after our parents right. I hope we never disappoint them or hurt them or let them down.